“Every Woman” has become my favorite part of MeMe She. As I, so very gratefully, make my way down a list of phenomenal women, and see this piece of my blog unfold, I can’t help but feel a little amazed delight that this was all divinely fixed. The connection, energy, and inspiration from each conversation has been… beautiful. Sisterhood really is powerful.
Anesha Birchett. I know Anesha from high school. We both went to Renaissance, on the west side of Detroit. We were both in the choir. So were both of our husbands (her boo, Bryan aka B-Moody and my boo, Brian aka B-Mitch). Ahhhh ‘Love and Choir’…. “I saw you often…you were always kind; I just didn’t know if you liked me….” It was funny to hear her say that to me when we spoke on the phone for the very first time a couple of months ago. Funny because it made me suddenly self-reflect on my introverted personality and what that looked like in high school compared to now. Though I still sometimes subconsciously default to being socially inhibited, shy… I’ve evolved a lot in that area.
My impression of Anesha…. super talented, confident, and vibrantly gorgeous. I’ve been watching her from the social media window these past several years and I’m always proud to see her pop up on my timeline.
Anesha is a songwriter slash singer. After high school, at age nineteen, she moved to Atlantic City. Rodney Jerkins (aka Darkchild) offered her a publishing contract with an advance. A year later she had her first major placement on singer Tamia. And then she collaboratively wrote a top ten record on the Billboard R&B charts for Shareefa, ‘Need a Boss’. She was a free agent for a couple of years before her and Antea, her older sister and business partner (aka APLUS), got a major publishing contract from Universal Music Group, which is currently who she is with.
She has written over a hundred songs that have placed and has sung background vocals for more than a few…JLo, Ciara, Mary Mary, Justin Beiber. Tamia’s ‘I can’t Get Enough of You’, yeah, that’s all her. She has written music, performed, and recorded background vocals on several episodes of Lee Daniel’s STAR and Empire on Fox. She just won a Grammy for ‘Gone Away’, from H.E.R’s joint mixtape. Anesha is that deal. Period.
A few weekends ago I got a chance to connect with her and talk to her about her journey (since Renaissance), pregnancy, music, and life.
ON INSPIRATION
I wrote a blog post called “Notes from 4 women I adore,” … It’s my favorite thing to ask in my ‘Every Woman’ series. What four women do you adore and what notes have you taken from them?
I definitely would start with my family, my sisters. That’s two women right there, Angela and Antea. All three of us work in entertainment. Of course, me and Antea have always worked together in business and just being women in such male dominating industries and still being able to succeed while holding on to your morals, my sisters have definitely displayed that for me, since I’m a lot younger than them. Antea is five years older than me; Angela is seven years older than me. Angela, she’s a Broadway actress, getting ready to do the Clark Sister’s movie…it’s been hard for her, but she’s kept her sanity and morale and her kindness all throughout her whole journey and I’ve been able to watch it. So yeah, those two definitely, top of the list.
I freaking love Angela Bassett. I still get angry at the fact that she didn’t get an Oscar for ‘What’s Love Got to Do With it.’ I still have debates about it even though I was only like seven when it came out. I still to this day don’t understand. She’s beautiful. She’s timeless with how she looks and it’s natural. She’s great.
…My mom. …My mom since I was a kid got up every morning, four a.m. to make us breakfast and lunches, and drop us off at school and would head to the hospital because she is a respiratory therapist. And she still does that to this day. She’s been doing that since before I even got here. My mother is strong, consistent… I get my strength from my mom.
Have you ever felt discouraged or contemplated if you should stop pursuing your dream? If so, what did you tell yourself or what did someone tell you that encouraged you to keep going?
I’m actually going through that right now. I’m actually kind of on the other side of it, revving myself back up. This pregnancy that I’m going through right now was not planned. I kind of figured I would be getting nominated for a Grammy, so I had stuff planned out in my mind, how everything was going to work and then everything just changed. And it’s been a super rough pregnancy since, so that did some things to me mentally. Since nineteen I’ve been on and off planes, going to writing sessions all over the world and it has drastically stopped. Like everything has stopped. So yeah, there’s been plenty of times… I’m thirty plus and I’m considered a veteran song writer at this point in the industry. And the industry is changing so fast, faster than I can even comprehend, than what it used to be when I first started ten, fifteen years ago. And that can be discouraging you know. Sitting at the house, hurting and in pain and wondering if I can just still, you know, get out here, get on these planes, write these songs and show up for these great opportunities and still continue singing, putting music out with my sister and doing projects on my own. So yeah, but I’m teetering on the end of ‘girl you got this’ ‘stop tripping’ ‘you’re good.’ There are so many women who don’t even have support, family, or a husband, or anything like that who still be out here getting their dreams. Taraji P Henson is a perfect example of that so. Yeah.
What is an aphorism or piece of advice from your parents that you repeat to yourself the most?
My dad, he always has something to say. He’s literally been the pillar of my sisters and I doing music and entertainment. He pushed us… My dad and I shared the same kind of anxiety issues so once he started becoming more open about that sort of thing (cause my dad is a man’s man, so of course that didn’t happen until he was fifty-eight, fifty-nine, sixty before he was like, ‘yes I have anxiety’) … But he always would say, ‘Anesha no matter what, you wake up in the morning do what you got to do, go to the bed at night and wake up in the morning the next day and do it again.’ Period. That’s what life is all about. Regardless of what’s going on in between, as long as you make it to that bed, go to sleep so you can wake up the next morning and try again.
ON LOVE
What do you love the most about love?
Ooooohhhh, love is a movie. Period. It’s just something different going on every day with that, with love. There are so many aspects of it, so many branches from that tree. But I love how love inspires me constantly. Even if I’m sitting in the house being a hermit. All I got to think about is just literally my relationship with Bryan. To this day me and him both look at each other and be like, ‘How did we end up married?’ How did we end up being together for twelve, thirteen years? We never ever ever, ever saw that coming. Never. We weren’t even each other’s type! We’re the best of friends. We’ve literally gone through so much together and I’ve learned about a different kind of love with him. Love is fun. Love is a lot. But I love love.
ON FAMILY
What is one of your fondest memories with your sisters?
Probably when we were children and we went to Disney World together. That was a lot of fun. I was six… We were there for five days. It was a trip that my dad actually won from work from like a job picnic. He won a raffle or something like that and we all got to go to Disney World so that was a lot of fun. He filmed it. It literally looks like reality TV today. It’s hilarious! It’s literally an hour and half tape of us just walking around Disney, just acting a fool. It’s very entertaining.
ON STYLE
Who or what has influenced your style (hair, make-up, clothes) the most?
I guess this is taboo cause I always get compared to her, but I love Jill Scott. I’ve always loved Jill Scott. I think she just understands how to dress her figure. And I’m obsessed with her confidence. I’m a little tom boyish here and there so. I don’t go out much and I am not posting pictures of me being fashionable every time. If you know me, know me, most would find me in some Givenchy’s and some jeans and a t-shirt. Or a Detroit vs Everybody hoodie with some dope kicks. …I’m very relaxed. I don’t consider myself to be a fashion icon, or fashion forward or anything like that. If it’s comfortable, if it’s affordable, and it fits my figure right, it doesn’t matter if it’s five dollars or five hundred, I’m going to wear it as best as I can.
ON LIFE
What do you wish you’d have known sooner in life?
That it was ok to go to college and pursue your dreams at the same time. I mean you know…. Yeah, I chose the harder route. Fresh out of high school, dropped out of college. And yes, it was a major pub deal, but I dealt with homelessness during that time. Eating scraps from a super producer because I didn’t have money to go and get myself food because I just wanted to be in this mansion amongst this super producer and all of these celebrities coming in and out, giving me an opportunity to write for them and I was just a nobody. I feel like now that I’m living my life and I have worked hard and I do see the fruits of my labor from when I was, you know, nineteen, in my early twenties, from songs I wrote back then, I think life would be a little more different if I had of stuck it out and took that full ride from Morgan State or that partial from Tennessee State. I had five scholarships, four full rides and one partial. And went to OCC (Oakland Community College), where I did very well, had a 3.8 and I got a phone call from Rodney Jerkins and… my life changed. I don’t even know how he got my number, but he called me while I was in choir rehearsal and I dropped out. I went to Jersey and started my career in music publishing and song writing. But I see so many young people who are doing it now, song writing, doing the whole rat race thing that I did, but they are staying in school and figuring it out, getting an education and still going to these writing sessions. I probably could have. I could have done that but no regrets. No regrets at all. But yeah, I think I probably would have done that a little differently when I was younger.
If you could redo something, anything in life at all, what would it be?
I’m not really big on regret. I feel like every little thing I go through in life is what builds character.
ON MUSIC
You sang at the Aretha Franklin tribute at Chene Park last August. What’s your all-time favorite Aretha song?
Scary stuff, that was scary stuff…. That! For real, that’s why when the musical director for the whole thing asked me, and he said it, I was like dang, did he know that was my favorite song? Yeah, ‘Until you come back to me,’ that’s one of my favorite Aretha songs. Cause she just ugh, sanging.
What’s your favorite song right now?
See I’m kind of ratchet with my choice of music. (It’s ok sis, I have my low-key ratchet moments too, laughs) For real, it’s really bad cause I’m on both ends of the spectrum. On a normal day, I’ll turn on Watercolors because I don’t want to hear nothing. I don’t want to hear no lyrics, no ad libs from the Migos, nobody. And then I’ll have another moment and turn on freaking 2 Chainz new album and turn on that ‘Me’ record ***start’s singing*** ‘…I said me.’ That song…his whole album. I love Anderson Paak’s album. That’s kind of different right now. But I don’t have a favorite song. That’s really kind of…. you know what? I’ll just say this. I’ll say ‘Focus,’ by H.E.R. Because I just think that song is timeless right now.
If you had to choose a theme song that described the first few months of 2019, what would it be?
That’s tough. I don’t know Amyre… I want the Fresh Prince song to get out of my head because that’s my favorite show…. I’d say ‘Money’ by Cardi because I got a baby on the way so, I hear what the doc saying about bed rest but, I got to write these songs! So yeah, Money.
ON PREGNANCY
What were some of the first thoughts that popped into your head when you found out you were pregnant?
Well (laughs)… they’re all negative, that’s so bad… ‘What are you doing Anesha?’ was one. Two, ‘Anesha why?’ Three, ‘I wonder if I can do this.’ For real, I’ve literally lived out of a suitcase the past twelve years of my life. So, to have to just (sigh) bring it on down and be responsible for a person who is helpless, a little one that’s helpless, that is terrifying. But I’ve always wanted kids. Out of all of my sisters, I’ve always been the one that’s been the most vocal, ‘I’m going to have me a little basketball team’ since I was young. I want all boys. So, I mean, yeah, I was scared. Petrified.
ON BEING YOU
What’s something you will never change about yourself?
My personality. I’ve been around a lot of Hollywood and I don’t think I’ve changed much. I’m still not really moved by making sure my nails are always done, making sure my face is beat, making sure I’m always following the trends… I think I’m pretty grounded so that will never change… It’s too hard. It’s too much work.
ON BECOMING
What do you envision your “I have arrived” moment to look like? The moment you say to yourself, ‘I am living my dream.‘
Honestly, right now, successfully having this baby. When I see him, I think life, everything is going to change. My motivation, my work ethic, everything is going to change because I will constantly have a different type of incentive in front of me. …A child. And that is very very important to me. So yeah, that. Definitely this baby… I’ve had gynecologists tell me, ‘you might have a hard time getting pregnant.’ Even though that’s so retarded to say that to me. But a couple of them said, ‘you might be high risk,’ ‘you might have a couple of complications based on the things that we’re finding.’ And for just a hot night to turn into a blessing like that. So yeah, I’m nervous, but I’m excited to successfully have this kid.
Anesha, thank you for meeting me in the middle of Sprinter (the Winter esque Spring ambiance that had been vexing Michigan) and sharing your beautiful light. All of my love to you and all of God’s blessings to you and your growing family. Period.
Photo credit: Timothy Blanks
P.S. Every Woman: Ideeyah and Every Woman: Renee
